曾經觀點和老板的不一致？曾經和同事想法不同？由于對一個項目看法不一而被一位同事打暈？（呃，也許最后一種有些夸張，不過這樣的事情真的曾發(fā)生過……)

    Make use of the following tips to resolve conflict at work. 你可以試著利用下面的方法來解決職場矛盾。

    (1) Choose your battles. 矛盾的性質嚴重嗎

    How important is the dispute really? Does it truly affect you, and is it a chronic problem? If it's a one-time incident or mild transgression, let it pass, says Steven Menack, a professional divorce and business mediator.

    (2) Expect conflict. 認識到矛盾時時處處都會出現(xiàn)

    Decide that friction will occasionally emerge in the course of human relationships, Stieber says. Don't fear it -- rather, learn to spot the symptoms early and see opportunity in the resolution.

    (3) Use neutral language. 避免強烈的語氣

    Avoid judgmental remarks or sweeping generalizations, such as, "You always turn your reports in late." Use calm, neutral language to describe what is bothering you. For example: "I get very frustrated when I can't access your reports because it causes us to miss our deadlines." Be respectful and sincere, never sarcastic, Menack suggests.

    (4) Practice preventive maintenance. 就事論事

    Avoid retreating to the safety of withdrawal, avoidance or the simplistic view that your co-worker is a "bad person," Stieber says. These are defense mechanisms that prevent the resolution of conflict.

    Menack suggests focusing on the problem, not the person. Never attack or put the other person on the defensive, he says. Focus on actions and consequences.

    (5) Listen actively. 主動聆聽

    Never interrupt the other party, Menack urges. Really listen and try to understand what the other person is saying. Let him know you understand by restating or reframing his statement or position, so he knows you have indeed heard him.

    (6) Get leverage on yourself. 發(fā)揮杠桿作用

    When dissent between you and a co-worker appears without resolution, it is time to get leverage. Ask to be held accountable. This brings your performance evaluation into the equation but without taking away your responsibility for resolving the conflict. This is hard to do, but remarkable change can happen when you are held to task.